The following paper will be distributed at the weekend and discussed at the Flower Festival 2018 Planning Meeting on Monday 5th February
Proposal: That
the First Aldborough Hatch Extreme Ironing Championships be staged on Sunday 24th
June 2018
on The Green at
St. Peter’s Church as part of the Entertainment at the
38th
St. Peter’s Flower Festival and Craft Market
History
Extreme ironing (also called EI) is
an extreme sport in which people take ironing boards to remote locations and iron items of clothing. According
to the Extreme Ironing Bureau, extreme ironing is "the latest danger sport that combines the thrills of an extreme
outdoor activity with the satisfaction of a well-pressed shirt."
Some locations where such performances have taken
place include a mountainside of a difficult climb;
a forest; in canoe;
while skiing or snowboarding;
on top of large bronze statues;
in the middle of a street; underwater; in the middle of the M1 motorway;
whilst parachuting; and under the ice sheet of a frozen lake. The performances
have been conducted solo or by groups.
Phil Shaw invented the sport. He arrived home in
1997 in Leicester after a hard day’s work in a knitwear factory to a
mountain of ironing and decided it was too dull to iron indoors, so he
took it into his garden. When his housemate came home he asked what Phil
what he was doing and Phil said, "Extreme Ironing".
There is a German branch of the Extreme Ironing
Bureau and the first World Championships were held in 2002, with eighty
teams from ten countries who navigated an obstacle course, pressing boxer
shorts and blouses while scaling a climbing wall, hanging from a
moss-covered tree branch and squeezing through the bonnet of a car.
When judging the ironing counts for 60 points, style for 40 and speed for
20.
There are now some 1,500 extreme ironists practising
worldwide and some teams have received corporate backing. Calls are now
being made for the sport's inclusion in the Olympics. "If you
can have synchronised swimming and curling, I think extreme ironing has
as much to offer," Phil has said. And I am with him all the
way, especially up that climbing wall!
Ben Fogle – the TV presenter, explorer and toff, whose book I have just read entitled English, Marmite, Queuing and Weather – holds the view - to which I would fully subscribe - that whilst EI is not as physically challenging as some sports, the difficulty lies 'in the extreme embarrassment of ironing in a street in front of large crowds'.
Ben Fogle – the TV presenter, explorer and toff, whose book I have just read entitled English, Marmite, Queuing and Weather – holds the view - to which I would fully subscribe - that whilst EI is not as physically challenging as some sports, the difficulty lies 'in the extreme embarrassment of ironing in a street in front of large crowds'.
A branch of ironing has been developed that
includes both bungee jumping and well-pressed clothing. Bungee ironing is what
some would call the ultimate in the thrill of extreme ironing. The sport gained
international attention after a documentary entitled Extreme Ironing:
Pressing for Victory, was produced for Channel 4 by
Wag TV. The programme followed the British team's efforts and eventual Bronze
and Gold placings in the 1st Extreme Ironing World Championships in
Germany. A side-story looked at the rivalry between the EIB (Extreme Ironing
Bureau) and a breakaway group called Urban Housework who were trying to establish
their own extreme sport based around vacuum-cleaning.
I would propose that
the St. Peter’s Flower Festival 2018 Planning Meeting on Monday 5th
February 2018 consider the Proposal overleaf.
Proposal
(1)
That the First-ever Aldborough Hatch Extreme Ironing
Championships be staged on Sunday 24th June 2018 at a
prime time, such as late morning or early afternoon, on The Green at St.
Peter’s Church as part of the Entertainment.
(2)
That the Championships be divided into two stages:
Stage One: Stationary Ironing in which the Contestants are required to iron two tea
towels and two handkerchiefs to a high standard over a 10-minute period, points
being awarded for ironing (60 points) and style (40).
Stage Two: Ironing on the Obstacle Course.
This would be along the pathways in the churchyard where three ‘ironing points’
would be marked where contestants would be required to iron one tea towel and
one handkerchief to a high standard. A series of simple obstacles would litter
the course (such as a bath of water which contestants would be required to wade
from one end to the other and other jolly capers, but no climbing ladders, onto
roof tops or up church towers for we want to encourage young and the elderly to
participate). Points would be awarded as follows: ironing (40 points),
overcoming obstacles with style and grace (40) and speed (20 to the winner, 15
to the second and 10 to the third). Those coming in after an hour would be
referred to the paramedics on hand that day.
(3) A
suitably inscribed cup would be presented to the winner to be retained until
the date of the next Championships. The winner’s name would be inscribed on the
cup.
(4) Certificates
would be awarded to all, including those who need paramedic attention.
(5) Ben
Fogle will be invited to act as Chief Judge and will be offered travelling
expenses from his home in West London (40p per mile) but no fee (although we
would present him with a signed copy of Aldborough
Hatch – The Village in the Suburbs – A History). Ron Jeffries would be
Assistant Judge, but in the event of Ben Fogle not being available due to the
fact that he is rowing down the Nile in a Pith Helmet or swimming the Channel
in a Mr Blobby Suit, Ron Jeffries would assume the mantle of Chief Judge. The decisions
of the Chief Judge will be final and no appeals will be tolerated. No Sir!
(6) A
flyer would be produced with the rules – including maximum size of ironing
board, iron, tea towels and handkerchiefs, appropriate attire (we do not want
anyone flaunting themselves in unseemly fashion). An entry fee of a punnet of
fresh strawberries would be required from each contestant, brought on the day
and handed to the Chief Judge.
(7) The
Championships would be widely advertised in the media – local press, TV and
radio to encourage maximum crowds and TV, radio and press coverage. It will be
necessary to have stewards controlling the crowds to that when The Green’s capacity
has been reached for both those seated and standing, onlookers be encouraged to
line up on the pavement in Oaks Lane to watch over the hedge (which may need to
be trimmed to a reasonable height). Crowd control on the obstacle course route
is essential.
Important
caveat: If this is approved, I would insert a notice in the March BROADSHEET inviting
potential contestants to contact me for details. Unless we have a minimum of
six signed up by mid-April, we will NOT go ahead.
Ron Jeffries CSM
1st February 2018 *CSM: Certified of Sound Mind
