I cannot remember jokes. But I have now remembered
two, both told at St. Paul’s Cathedral. The first was a Christmas joke. The
second came today at Eucharist at the start of the Sermon by the Chancellor,
Canon in Residence, Mark Oakley.
A parish had a very unpopular Vicar who was arrogant
and generally unpleasant, whilst his sermons droned in for ever and ever and
even long than that. The parochial church council finally plucked up the
courage to ask him to leave. “I will
leave when Jesus tells me to,” said the Vicar. A year passed and again the
Vicar was asked to leave. “As I said last
year, I will leave when Jesus tells me to do so,” said the Vicar. Another
year passed and the Vicar announced at the beginning of the Service that he
would be leaving next day, whereupon the organist burst into a hearty rendering
of “What a friend we have in Jesus!”
Following the service at St. Paul’s, I caught the
Number 15 bus to Tower Hill, a river boat to Greenwich and the Docklands Light
Railway to Stratford. On the DLR, where there are driver-less trains operated
by computers, I discovered that we no longer have train drivers or guards, for
a notice informed me: “Please do not
distract the Passenger Service Agent when the train is being operated from the
front.” Passenger Service Agent, my foot!
But it was a good day in warm spring sunshine and
with my Freedom pass the only transport cost was £3.50 on the river!
